Myth or Truth?

Sex is one of the most natural human experiences, yet it remains one of the most misunderstood. Cultural, religious, and societal influences have created deep-seated taboos that distort our perception of pleasure, intimacy, and even our own bodies.

In honour of World Sex Day, let’s separate fact from fiction by looking at 9 common myths about sex; debunking six common myths that are totally untrue and highlighting three that are actually true.

By understanding the difference between fact and fiction, we can all learn lessons that can lead to better intimacy, stronger relationships, and a healthier attitude toward pleasure. So let's get into it...

❌ Myth 1 - "Only Penetrative Sex ‘Counts’ as Real Sex" 

The Myth: Society often defines sex narrowly and only penis-in-vagina intercourse is seen as "real" sex, ignoring other forms of pleasure.

The Truth: Sex is whatever brings you and your partner(s) pleasure and connection.

• Oral sex, manual stimulation, mutual masturbation, and even sensual touch are all valid forms of intimacy.
• Many women don’t orgasm from penetration alone.
• Expanding your definition of sex can lead to more satisfying experiences.

Broaden your sex play to include:

• Exploring non-penetrative pleasure with a partner.
• Focusing on sensation rather than performance.

✅ Myth 2 - "Morning Sex Is Better"

The Myth: Morning intimacy often leads to more satisfying sexual experiences.

The Truth: It really can... because science!

• Testosterone peaks in the morning for both sexes (highest 7-9 AM).
• Sleep restores physical stamina and lowers inhibitions by reducing prefrontal cortex activity,.
• Morning light stimulates serotonin production, enhancing emotional connection during intimacy.
• Empty stomachs mean better blood flow to erogenous zones.

Make the most of it:

• Set your alarm 30 minutes early twice a week for intimate time.
• Keep lube and condoms in your nightstand for spontaneous mornings.
• Try "sleepy sex" – slow, sensual connection as you wake up.

❌ Myth 3 - "Men Think About Sex Every 7 Seconds"

The Myth: The stereotype that men are constantly horny while women are passive or disinterested.

The Truth: This is a ridiculous exaggeration. Desire varies by individual, not gender.

• Women can have high libidos; men can have low ones—and both are normal. Desire isn’t gender-exclusive.
• Stress, hormones, mental health, and relationship dynamics affect desire.
• Societal shaming of women’s sexuality has suppressed open expression of desire.

Instead of assumptions, consider:

• Normalizing conversations about fluctuating libidos.
• Recognizing that arousal isn’t always spontaneous (responsive desire is valid too).

❌ Myth 4 - "If You’re Not Having Sex, Your Relationship Is Doomed"

The Myth: A "dead bedroom" is often seen as a sign of inevitable breakup, and couples are shamed for not having frequent sex.

The Truth: Relationships thrive on intimacy, not just sex.

• Some couples have less sex due to stress, health, or simply personal preference.
• Emotional closeness, cuddling, and non-sexual touch maintain bonds.
• Pressuring a partner into sex damages trust and connection.

Don't panic, try:

• Discussing needs without judgment.
• Exploring other forms of intimacy if sex isn’t a priority right now.

✅ Myth 5 - "Orgasms Relieve Stress"

The Myth: Climaxing provides measurable stress reduction.

The Truth: Studies show a 50-75% reduction in perceived stress immediately after orgasm

• Orgasms trigger oxytocin release, i.e. the "cuddle hormone", which lowers cortisol by up to 75% and dopamine production, which can improve mood for 2-4 hours post-orgasm.
• Post-orgasm prolactin creates natural drowsiness, aiding sleep.
• The act itself can distract from anxious thoughts through sensory focus, which creates a "mental reset" from anxious thought patterns.

How to take advantage of it:

• Schedule "stress relief sessions" – quick solo or partnered release during high-tension days.
• Combine orgasms with aromatherapy (lavender) for enhanced relaxation.
• Practice "aftercare" – 10 minutes of cuddling post-orgasm to maximize oxytocin benefits.

❌ Myth 6 - "Bigger Penises = Better Sex"

The Myth: Deeper penetration equals greater pleasure.

The Truth: Size can have little to do with sexual satisfaction.

• Most nerve endings in the vagina are in the first few inches.
• Skill, communication, and emotional connection matter way more than size.
• Many people with larger partners report discomfort rather than pleasure.

Rather than worrying about going deep:

• Experiment with shallow thrusting (2-3 inch depth) to maximize clitoral/G-spot contact.
• Master the Coital Alignment Technique.

❌ Myth 7 - "If You’re Not Having Sex, You’re Abnormal"

The Myth: Society often treats celibacy or asexuality as strange or unhealthy.

The Truth: Not everyone wants or needs sex—and that’s okay.

• Asexuality is a valid orientation.
• Some people abstain for personal, religious, or mental health reasons.
• Your worth isn’t tied to sexual activity.

Don't judgment, be mindful of:

• Respecting others’ choices without questioning them.
• Recognizing that intimacy comes in many forms.

✅ Myth 8 - "Sex Gets Better With Age"

The Myth: Long-term sexual satisfaction increases with decades of experience.

The Truth: A greater proportion of older adults do indeed report higher sexual satisfaction than amongst younger adults.

• Studies suggest that 75% of 60+ couples report being sexually satisfied vs 55% of 20-somethings.
• Many couples in long-term relationships learn each other’s preferences deeply.
• With age comes greater experience, better communication and less shame around desires.
• Many report intensified orgasms due to thinner vaginal walls/prostate sensitivity.

Keep a record to prove it:

• Keep a "pleasure journal" to track how your preferences evolve decade by decade.

❌ Myth 9 - "Good Sex Means Simultaneous Orgasms"

The Myth: Movies and porn often depict sex as a perfectly synchronized event where both partners climax at the same time.

The Truth: Orgasm isn’t the only goal of sex—pleasure is.

• Only about 25-30% of women consistently orgasm from penetration alone.
• Taking turns, using hands or toys, and enjoying the journey can be just as satisfying.
• Pressure to perform can actually make orgasms harder to achieve.

Instead of focusing on the finish line, try:

• Extending foreplay.
• Celebrating pleasure in all its forms, even without orgasm.