Monday 15 April 2024

A Marriage of Inconvenience


So yeah, I'm now a married woman. Apparently, anyway... It's all a bit of a mess but I suppose the best place to start is always at the beginning.

If you follow my new hubby, Ace, on Twitter, you maybe have recently seen him taking part in the current trend of clicking on some widget to generate your Twitter family tree. And, according to that, I should be his wife. So all just a bit of silly fun so far...

What was not so fun was when we both received marriage certificates through the post! It would seem that someone working at the registry office took the post a little bit too seriously and concluded that it was legit. Somehow, off the back of that, we have now been made legally wed!

Obviously, we've already applied to have the marriage annulled seeing as, you know, it never even happened! You would think the lack of our signatures would be the big give away but in this age of digital presences, I suppose all of that old fashioned stuff is starting to go out the window.

But in the meantime, if I am to be legally wed to someone, I insisted that I should at least have the benefits that come along with it. Such as being gifted a pretty ring to wear, getting to dress up in a fancy dress and be treated like a princess for a day and, of course, getting to experience the passion of a wedding night. As they say, might as well try to make the best of a bad situation!

It took a little bit of convincing to get Ace to go along with my request. By which I mean, that he wasn't particularly enthusiastic until I mentioned that he would get to spend the night with me, at which point he very quickly got on board with the idea.

To be fair, I only made the proposal because we do have some history. We've worked together a whole bunch of times in a professional capacity, so we are no strangers to being intimate with one another. And there was even one time that I fucked him simply because I was horny as fuck. So, in the back of my mind, I could at least be sure that there was some established compatibility there already.

Of course, it is not easy to organise a wedding at literally a day's notice. It's probably even more difficult to organise a faux wedding like this one because no-one will take you seriously when you are trying to book things. But I did manage to get us a nice wedding suite, complete with a very yummy looking cake, as well as find myself a gorgeous bridal gown to wear. 

Ace was left in charge of sorting out the rings and things suddenly started to feel very real when he dropped to one knee and presented me with mine. All of a sudden I had butterflies in my stomach. Some thing that I had not expected at all. Even though we were just doing this for a bit of fun while making the most of a dumb clerical error, I would be lying if I said that I didn't get a little bit emotional in that moment.

With my new ring now in place on my finger to make it all official, it was now my turn to get down on my knees. However, instead of sliding a ring on to his finger, I slid something else along an entirely different appendage.

I unbuckled his belt and dropped his trousers. His cock instantly stood to attention as I placed my lips against the tip of it and showed my dedication to him by sliding them all the way down to the base. Just like the location on my finger of where his gift to me was now situated. 

To be honest, I think the blowjob that I was beginning to give him was appreciated much more than any bit of jewellery would have been. Certainly a lot more pleasurable. I slurped on his meaty fuck stick good and proper, giving him a truly memorable sloppy blowjob to celebrate our new union.

Of course, every good marriage involves some give and take to make things work. In this case, I did my wifely duty of taking the whole length of his shaft as he gave it me all the way to the back of my throat. I'm not quite sure that that is necessarily the sort of thing that that saying is referring to, but it works in this case, so let's just go with it!


By this point, I was caught in two minds. On one hand, I really wanted to feel his girthy cock inside me. To consummate our faux marriage, of course. Not because I'm some sort of sex-crazed pervert who relishes being brought to orgasm by a nice fat dick. Nope, definitely just because it is all part of the tradition of a wedding day... 

And on the other hand, I was trying to do the math inside my head about how I could possibly extricate myself from beautiful wedding gown in the least awkward way, or whether there was some way to make fucking work without having to go through that ordeal. In the end, I felt it best to just bite the bullet and make Ace wait a moment while I did my best to disrobe for him.

I won't pretend like it was my most seductive of undressing. And I may have muttered a few very choice curse words under my breath as my haste only served to make my life more difficult. But Ace's patience was eventually rewarded with the sight of me in nothing but some sexy lingerie.

Some sexy lingerie that quickly started to disappear itself as I dropped my panties to the floor and then casually flicked them across the room.

Straddling Ace's lap, I carefully lowered myself onto his cock, gradually taking more and more of it inside me until my greedy pussy had devoured the whole thing. I feel like this was the moment that we truly sealed the deal as man and wife... even if it is hopefully just a temporary situation.

The funny thing was that this wasn't even our first time fucking on our "wedding day". Before arriving at our wedding suite, we had both come directly from a porn shoot that we did together for Ace's porn studio. Naturally, that shoot was purely about business so was very professional. Not at all like this. 

Coming from that environment into a much more intimate one like this took some adjusting to. Initially, I feel like we were a bit hesitant to let ourselves go and enjoy the intimacy of the moment. But once I started to get into my rhythm of riding on his cock, we both began to feel more at ease with the situation and quickly started to relax and just enjoy what is supposed to be a magical night for any newly wed couple.

And then just like that, Ace started to treat me as if I was really his. After spinning me round on his lap, his hands firmly gripped my hips and guided my movements. They encouraged me to bounce on his dick in just the right way to please him. I was more than happy to play the dutiful wife who is eager to please her husband in whatever way he needs.


As I continued to play subservient to his desires and wishes, he made me ride him harder and faster. It felt great for me too as his cock was hitting me in just the right spot deep inside my cunt.

It felt so good that my body couldn't resist starting to move of its own accord. Bouncing turned into grinding as my hips involuntarily resisted what Ace's hands were encouraging them to do. A brief power play played out as our bodies quarrelled over exactly how we should be fucking. Our first ever tiff as a married couple, you could say.

Ace won out by asserting himself on me. Rising to his feet, he began ramming his black rod into my tight fuck hole. My tight walls tried desperately to squeeze his throbbing cock for all its worth but the pussy juices that were now streaming all the way down to my inner thighs gave him the freedom to glide his cock in and out of me with barely any resistance at all.

Such was the ferocity that he was now banging me with that we found our position somewhat precarious. Every time he slammed his manhood deep inside me, I teetered as if I was about to lose my balance and fall.

Picking me up, much like a husband carrying his wife across the threshold of their new home, he cradled me in his arms as he carried me across the room before carefully placing me down on the edge of the table that was home to our delicious looking wedding cake.

We shared a tender kiss as he carefully found the right hole to re-insert himself into. Once the head of his dick had slipped between my pussy lips, the slick walls of my cunt guided him the rest of the way as he resumed railing me hard and deep.

I clung on to him for dear life, fearful of putting too much weight or pressure on the table, lest it rock and tip, sending our cake crashing to the floor. My arms and legs wrapped around him as he hips repeatedly drove deep between my legs.

It seemed like it almost became like a challenge to him. The harder I held on to him, the harder he slammed his cock into me. And, just like before, he won out when I was left with no choice but to throw my hands out behind me to prop myself up and avoid being sent crashing into our cake.


Just like before, Ace had the sense to see the danger of our situation so gave me a little respite by pulling my bum of the edge of the table so that I dropped onto my feet and then spinning me around to fuck me from behind.

Knowing that he enjoys a hot bit of butt fucking, I waited with baited breathe to see which hole he would slide his fuck stick into. Would he continue with my pussy that he had already made wet and creamy, or would he finish with a flourish by sticking it up my arse?

Feeling his fingers carefully spread my pussy lips, I was sure I had my answer. Moments later it was confirmed as his throbbing cock slammed deep inside once more and his balls clapped against me.

Clap, clap, clap... he kept going, remorselessly railing me. Using me like his own personal fuck toy, which I suppose I legally am at this point.

With every thrust, he forced my whole body to rock forwards, at times coming perilously close to planting my face into our wedding cake. The closest call coming just as I began to cum. Crumpling face down onto the table as my knees buckled and my legs went limp, I came within centimetres of having a forehead covered in cake icing.  

It was obvious that Ace was close to cumming as well. I forlornly tried to get to my feet to allow him to finish himself off but my legs were still like jelly. Instead, Ace tenderly scooped me up and carefully placed my whole body on the table so he could me one last furious dicking while I tried to compose myself after being given my first orgasm as a married woman.

And it certainly was fast and furious. Lost in my cum drunk stupor, it felt like mere seconds before he dragged me off the table and onto my knees to receive my final wedding gift of the night. In truth, it may have been longer than that but my perception of reality was all of the place as I was still riding the wave of orgasmic bliss. The only thing that really registered to me at this point was the relentless clapping sound each time his hips thrust against against my now very tender and sensitive skin.

A blast of warm cum to the face finally snapped me back to my senses. The sudden realisation that I must have been acting completely on auto-pilot as I was now on my knees, both of my hands wrapped tightly around the shaft of his cock, milking every last drop of cum out. I guess that was just a bit of muscle memory coming out to play. I am no stranger to jerking off cocks after all.

To be honest, I wouldn't have minded if he had decided to cum inside me instead of on my face. Not that I would have been in any sort of state to protest. But, of all the times that I could get my pussy filled with cum, my wedding night would arguably be the most appropriate and possibly would have rounded out giving our faux wedding a more authentic feel. 

So there you have it; my first night as a wedded woman and how it all came about through some sort of clerical error.


Now, I genuinely don't know how long this marriage will last. Like I said at the outset, we've already submitted a request to the registry office that made this mistake to have the marriage annulled. But, if it entitles me to more hot sex like this, I wouldn't be opposed to them taking a little bit of time to straighten out this mistake.

And I won't lie or try to pretend that it was a nice feeling to fall asleep in the embrace in my husband's embrace. Sure, I had done this plenty of times before but this had a very different feeling to your typical one night stand. Perhaps it was just gratitude to the fates that I have at least been paired up with someone I already considered a friend and the security that gave me. Can you imagine if it had been some random who I didn't even know?! I don't even want to think about it...

Regardless of whether it could have turned out much worse, I'll try my best not to get too attached to this current situation though. Like I said, this is just a temporary arrangement while everything gets figured out. Until then though, I do my best to act the part.


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